our little mover and shaker

So we're having a baby. It's official now. Darcie doesn't just have an extra kidney. We can now see little hands and feet, a little spine, a little heartbeat, and a little profile. I have to say, going to the second ultrasound was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I wasn't able to make the first ultrasound, but Darcie said it wasn't anything like the second. Then they were just measuring from the head to the rump, like getting a kid to stand against a wall to measure his or her height. This time it was like the full physical. They measured the size of the brain, the size of the spine, and the distance between different organs. It was incredible.

I've compared abortion to the holocaust before, but now I honestly don't think that goes far enough. Obviously we can't overstate the tragedy of that period of human history - one of the darkest and most unthinkable evils man could ever step into, but the Jewish people had lived, loved, and been loved, and had experienced the full range of what it means to be 'human.' They were able to cry out when they were murdered at the injustice of the tragedy. Unborn children can't do that. Their future is ripped from them even before they have a chance to know the love of a mother or a father, to love another or experience the joy of having a best friend. Thankfully, though, at this moment such crimes are as removed from me as the holocaust. While I can picture dimly the evil, I really can't imagine it actually happening. I'm too busy being excited about being a father.

When I saw the first ultrasound photos it was still pretty unreal. There was a big circle and a little circle. Apparently the big circle was the head. Now the little circle is trying to catch up with the big circle. Not only does our kid have a big head, but the ultrasound lady said "looks like baby's been snacking well!" She also said that our wee one is "a mover and a shaker." She was having a hard time getting good pictures because our baby was swimming all over the place. The ultrasound lady said that baby was using Darcie's bladder like a trampoline. No wonder she felt like going to the bathroom so much that morning. It's bad enough that they make you drink four glasses of water before having an ultrasound, without having a little person jumping up and down on your bladder! I also think our child might be a boxer, because those little fists were working in and out, taking mini-jabs at the walls his or her little room (which happened to be mommy's tummy).

One of the moments that struck me the most, though, was when, for only a couple of seconds, a tiny footprint was outlined on the video monitor. It was exactly like your or my footprint, only tiny. Perhaps baby was doing laps and was just pushing off from the wall, but for a moment I saw the cutest little foot I had ever seen. Only I and the ultrasound lady saw it. It was as though junior was saying "look me go, daddy!"

For now I can't see baby. There's not even much that Darcie and I can do to help our young one grow. Our child is in the hands of God, and we know that He is knitting our young one together in the womb, as the psalmist describes it in Psalm 139. Our Father sees our little one's unformed body, and I am coming to see how 'fearfully and wonderfully made' each one of us is. I'm glad that I'm not responsible for this part of it - our Father has worked this miracle many times before, and knows exactly what He is doing. I know, too, that each time he adds something special to create a unique little person to bring Him glory, like a magnificent piece of artwork bearing its creator's name, only this art goes beyond canvas into a magical new life beyond anything we can imagine.

As Darcie's tummy grows, and as I become more conscious of the reality of a new life and a new member of our family, my love for the baby grows, as does my wonder at my bride and my amazement at her beautiful body. Right now I can't lavish the love on my child directly, but my care and fatherly instincts go into protecting, caring for, and loving the tremendous wife God has given me and the marvelous gift she has within her.

I couldn't be more blessed.

My Favourite Birthday!

On Friday February 2nd, I turned 26 years old. I've had a lot of fantastic birthdays in the past.  Glamour sleepover parties in grade 4, a beach party in grade 5, a tobogganing party for my sweet 16. But this year - this year was the most memorable.  Keith had the day off on Friday so I took a holiday from work and spent the day with him.  Our plan was to sleep late - however the phone woke us up at 7 and then again at 8.  The caller left a message the second time - and much to my chagrin, Keith asked me to get up to listen to the message so the incessant "beep" at 15 second intervals wouldn't keep us up.  I am so grateful to him now.  The message was all the way from Kenya!  My dear Julia had called to wish me a happy birthday.  I called her back and when we got started talking we didn't stop for a hour even though we got disconnected twice!  It was glorious to hear her voice again.  I had just crawled back into bed at 9 when the phone rang again - this time it was my mom.  So I called her back as well and it wasn't until 9:30 that I once again snuggled down under the covers. The wonderful thing  was that I had no agenda - I didn't have to be up at any time and being kept from my bed by two of my best loved people was perfectly fine by me.  I finally got up around 11:15 and started to read.  When Keith got up we ate some breakfast and got cleaned up.  It was snowing huge fluffy flakes as we walked to the community centre rink.  We passed the puck back and forth for a while and when a hockey game got started Keith joined in and I walked home with snow-muffled steps to get warm. Keith made me blueberry pancakes for dinner and we drank red sparkling grapejuice and we reminisced about the first time he made me blueberry pancakes - when he proposed. After dinner we went to Dow's Lake and went for a beautiful and not-too-cold skate on the canal.  I held fast to Keith's hand - a bit scared to fall. We were both still full from dinner so he suggested a walk through Arboretum before we got some Beavertails. I found Keith reading a sign about some of the Winterlude activities.  He pointed to the snow show - it looked intriguing and I told him.  He told me he already had tickets - and led me towards the woods.  The snow show was quite possibly the funnest thing I've done on my birthday - partially due to the company! We were ushered into a curtained off scene and took our seats on the hay bails. The play began.  After the first two scenes - we climbed onto horse drawn sleighs and made our way to the next scene in the play further into the arboretum. This went on for 5 or 6 scenes and all the while I cuddled up next to Keith under our blanket and breathed in the night air.  We were fortunate that it wasn't too cold since I get chilled so easily outside - particularly after skating. When the play ended we ate our beavertails and drank hot chocolate and finally returned home.  It was a short stop at home though - since Keith had an 11 o'clock hockey game.  But even the game went well - his team won and he scored a goal and got two assists! It was a glorious day in the snow - relaxed and carefree.  I loved every minute.  I couldn't stop thinking about how blessed our little family has been - and how wonderful my life is.  Keith bought me the complete James Herriot books on cd collection (which I'm listening to while I write this post) as well as three more books on poverty and Africa and what the Christian community is doing about it.  I knew he had gone all out for my birthday this year and it made me feel so cherished.  So, you can imagine my surprise when he had just arrived home from work yesterday and I heard a knock at the door only to find a group of our closest Ottawa friends standing outside and shouting "Surprise!".  He even planned a party for me.  This is a tough act to follow - I'm glad I have 11 months to plan for his 26th birthday!